Fear

Its about 7am and i have been awake since 3am. I cant sleep. These last few weeks have emotionally, physically, and mentally drained me. So now that I have a little free time, I am feeling the aftermath. I have a lot to say but sometimes I dont know how to word it, so I just keep typing until it comes out. Usually when i am up this early its because I have a lot on my mind that I just need to get out. so WHAT AM I FEELING? For 1, im feeling sickness, like i havent been eating in a long time sick. #2 overwhelmed (u know that feeling you get when you have a lot to do in so little time?)#3 The most important FEAR. Its like, my evil twin. There is a lot that i fear just because of who I am. I am mostly fearful of my future, and actually living out my dream. I fear that everyone else will go on to do what they want in life, and I will be stuck working a 9-5 everyday. Im not an ordinary person, so I dont expect to live an ordinary life. I am the type of person that would love to tour city after city, promoting my music. But the scary part is, I am almost there, I mean I am so close I can taste it. But in all that, im still scared! Whoever would have thought your future could be so scary? I sure didnt. But now that I am practically living my future i am more fearful and unsure then ive ever been in my life. I know I dont look like the type but i cry almost everyday. Its suppose to be a cleansing, but instead its just another cry. I hope I can shake this feeling, and fast, because whether im scared or confident, their's no turning back. I am trying to stand up to fear, but right now whatever i do is just not working...any suggestions??? For now, ill just keep living for today, and hoping for a better tomorrow than the day before. Im out!